My Zen Arcade

So, I really do like Last Comic Standing.  Usually there are a number of non-ringers (i.e. people who HAVEN’T had a special on Comedy Central) who are just dead-on funny.  Further, unlike American Idol and the like, every contestant has had to work really hard, and put themselves on the line again and again before even getting to the point where they can audition.  The fact is that lots of people just end up with a great voice.  But no matter how funny you are, you have to generate material (which is different than shooting the shit with your friends and making them laugh).  More, singers don’t get heckled, as a rule.  In short, the folks on Last Comic have earned it, and the people on American Idol just haven’t had to go through the wringer that way.

This year, my number 1 choice is God’s Pottery.

Unfortunately, there are always a few who have no business being there.  I do understand that the show is about making money, selling ad time, and so forth.  Therefor, the people picked have to fit into that framework.  I understand, and, as I said at the beginning, they’ve all had to work to get where they are in the first place.  But sometimes I have a real problem with one of them.  At the moment, its Papa CJ.  First, he just isn’t that funny.  Thats a taste issue, yes, so I can let that slide.  The thing it that he falls into one of my “Annoying Comedian Classes”.  This includes comics with just one gag, comics with just one source of humor (Josh Blue, anyone?  BTW, I think he’s pretty funny and will do well if he can learn to write about things other than his handicap), and so forth.  Papa CJ drops into the most annoying bucket of all.  He thinks he’s edgy.  He comes out and says he’s edgy and offensive (all without irony):

Papa CJ’s cutting edge wit & social commentary represents the rising voice of a billion people - fresh and entertaining with a sly sting in the tail.

And, perhaps in India, he is.  I don’t know.  But he isn’t in the U.S., and that gets in the way of him actually being funny.  He has a bit where he picks an audiance member and talks about being reincarnated as the guys kid and getting to suck on his girlfriend’s breasts.  This is a funny line, but he goes into it by saying ‘Oh, yes, now you are all probably mad at me for saying these things and are thinking I’ll die’.  But he hasn’t said anything controversial (at least in a comedy club).  Its sort of like bragging about having paid your taxes on time and then talking about how people are so offended by you for being so smart.

Anyhow…

So, last night, we were watching American Idol.  Now, because of some weirdness we’ve yet to understand, we have to watch this on the non-HD channel, even though we are supposed to get the HD channel as well.  For whatever reason, it is shockingly unreliable.

Anyhow, we watch Idol starting 15 minutes late on our direct TV DVR (so we can skip commercials).  Right as it ends, we accidentally switch from the recording to the HD channel with Idol on it.  Surprisingly, we are actually getting the broadcast.

The difference in video quality was like a slap to the face.  We only caught the last two or three minutes of recap, but it was just stunning how much better it looked. 

You don’t usually get to see that kind of side-by-side, but never forget, the difference between standard and HD is not slight.

WOW

So, last year around this time, I bought an Aquos 52″ LCD TV. 

I want to make this abundantly clear: I love this thing.  There are people out there who talk trash about the Aquos line, but I don’t think there’s a better TV for the money (at least not a year ago).

ANYHOO, I also have a PS3 (love part II).  The Blu-Ray does look really nice EXCEPT in very dark areas where its kind of fuzzy.  I first noticed this, I think, on 300, but given the style of the movie, it was a little hard to tell if it was intentional or not.

I then started seeing it everywhere, except in animation.  I assumed that this was somehow a limitation on the media or something, but it stuck in my head.  Searching online revealed nothing until I simply searched for “blu-ray fuzzy” and saw others had the same problem, especially with the PS3.  The claims are bitrate issues (which I’m not sure you can do much about), limitations on how the movie is filmed (which I expect to be completely untrue on anything made in the last 5 years), and TV calibration. 

I’d tried calibrating the TV months ago with a free DVD that didn’t appear to do much for the picture.  But I keep running into stories of how amazing the picture looks AFTER you get the thing calibrated, how killer the blu-ray image is, practically 3D.  But I am NOT paying Best Buy 300 bucks to do this.  Actually, I don’t want to pay ANYONE 300 bucks to do this.

So I just ordered Digital Video Essentials: HD Basics on Blu-Ray.  20 bucks total to get it here tomorrow.  I’m gathering from poking around that this has been highly anticipated, so I’m pretty hopeful (in the literal sense) that it will help.

A few days ago, I wrote about Comcast’s intentions to put viewer monitoring cameras in their DVRs, allowing them to directly target their audiance with ads and such.

If you go to that article, you’ll see comcast was nice enough to reply.  And I ain’t buying it.

First they deny the technology is capable of monitoring viewers.  Its only going to allow for motion-based control, similar to  the Wii.  Of course, thats crap.  It will still be using a camera (as opposed to how the Wii does it).  If there’s a camera in the box, then even if it can’t get the detail level we fear, it certainly will SOONER OR LATER.

Second, Comcast (virtually all media) believes that advertising benefits its customers.  Well, thats not completely true.  They talk as if, somehow, having commercials that meet your parameters is beneficial.  They know the real beneficiaries are the advertisers and, of course, Comcast.  We, the customer, are simply the rubes.

Third, Comcast has a history of treating its customers like cattle.  It took us over a month to get our cable cards working for our Tivo.  I’ve spent hours upon hours on the phone with Comcast support.  I’ve had to pay the entire, OUTRAGEOUS bill even if I lose service for a day or more.  Comcast believes that they are still the only game in town.  And, as virtually all monopolies do, they think they can behave however they like.  Obviously, they aren’t the only players anymore, and haven’t been for a long time.  We eventually went with DirecTV and haven’t been happier!  Their DVR is actually pretty good, as compared to that box of junk Comcast dumps on you.  And now, with the advent of FIOS, they won’t be the only high-speed internet provider either (sure, there’s DSL, but I’m no fan).

Fourth, they limit your internet usage.  This isn’t a big deal for the average surfer, but it is HUGE for some people.   You can’t control how much bandwidth a person gets based on what they are using it for.   ‘Unlimited internet’ is advertised, but its only unlimited if you use a limited amount.  Kind of a contradiction, ain’t it?

Dear Comcast,

If you want to survive for another 10 years, I seriously suggest you stop trying to treat your customers like they are product.

Love,

Moleboy (and a gazillion other people)

Your Comcast DVR Is Watching You - Literally - dslreports.com

Comcast senior VP of user experience Gerard Kunkel tells New Tee Vee Comcast is experimenting with embedding cameras in your DVR or cable box, allowing the company to know exactly who is watching what, at what time. In theory this would allow them to dial up user age/gender specific ads depending who is in the room

Am I the only one who sees the contextual differences between the three statements below?
That aside, the fleeting expletive policy is just insane. What if Bono had gotten up there, tripped and banged his head and said ‘FUCK!’, which would be a pretty understandable thing to say?
The fact is that if hearing ‘fuck’ or ’shit’ on the air is going to corrupt your children’s morals, then, I have to say, you are doing a pretty crappy job of raising your kids.
I’m honestly not making fun the desire to keep this language on the air by people who don’t want their kids to hear it. What I’m making fun of is their belief that their children are not only a hair’s breadth away from going all evil and horrible, but that somehow a single word might do it.
We make a number of concessions to this attitude, and many of them reasonable. For example, we keep alot of things (not just words) relegated to timeslots of 10pm and later. I have no problem with asking parents to do something similar, like not letting their kids watch live awards shows.

Court will examine profanity rules - Yahoo! News

The FCC changed its policy on indecency following a January 2003 broadcast of the Golden Globes awards show by NBC when U2 lead singer Bono uttered the phrase “f—— brilliant.” The FCC said the “F-word” in any context “inherently has a sexual connotation” and can trigger enforcement.

NBC challenged the decision, but the case has yet to be resolved.

The Fox programs at issue in the case before the high court are a Dec. 9, 2002, broadcast of the Billboard Music Awards in which singer Cher used the phrase “F— ‘em” and a Dec. 10, 2003, Billboards broadcast in which reality show star Nicole Richie said, “Have you ever tried to get cow s— out of a Prada purse? It’s not so f—— simple.”